Retirement wishes funny

June 8, renuka Retirement 0. Retirement is a part of life; it is bliss to every human. This is time to take rest and enjoy yourself with friends and family. Occasions celebrated with humor and fun will definitely be remembered by everyone.

Farewell to our dearest colleagues

The occasion of retirement in the life of retirees is more crucial thing and if it is quoted with fun then it becomes fun occasion rather than sentimental one. How about giving the retiree a treat of good laugh with funny retirement quotes? The occasion of retirement are quoted with fun by many people. Here on this section you can find funny retirement quotes, which will long last in your mind.

Find every quote very much interesting that you yourself will start quoting in your own way. Below you find funny retirement quotes used to quote your boss, colleagues on their special occasion of retirement. May be you can use some of these quotes as retirement wishes for boss.

The best time to start thinking about Your retirement is before the boss does. When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. Before you speak, listen. Before you write, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you invest, investigate.

Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try. Before you retire, save. Before you die, give. There are some who start their retirement Long before they stop working. Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Harry Emerson Fosdick. When one door closes, another one opens, but we often look so long and regretfully at the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.

Teaching is one of the professions where one would give their whole life and dedication.Buy Here! Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. Question: When is a retiree's bedtime? Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch. If my body was a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull But that's not the worst of it Some folks ride the train of life Looking out the rear, Watching miles of life roll by, And marking every year.

They sit in sad remembrance, Of wasted days gone by, And curse their life for what it was, And hang their head and cry.

But I don't concern myself with that, I took a different vent, I look forward to what life holds, And not what has been spent. So strap me to the engine, As securely as I can be, I want to be out on the front, To see what I can see.

I want to feel the winds of change, Blowing in my face, I want to see what life unfolds, As I move from place to place. I want to see what's coming up, Not looking at the past, Life's too short for yesterdays, It moves along too fast. So if the ride gets bumpy, While you are looking back, Go up front, and you may find, Your life has jumped the track. It's all right to remember, That's part of history, But up front's where it's happening, There's so much mystery.

The enjoyment of living, Is not where we have been, It's looking ever forward, To another year and ten. It's searching all the byways, Never should you refrain, For if you want to live your life, You gotta drive the train!

retirement wishes funny

Footnotes: You can also send us your funny retirement sayings and quotes.Funny Retirement Wishes: Looking for humorous notes and quirky messages to write on a sweet card or to use in a speech? This post is a roller coaster ride through some of the silliest and funniest quotes about retiring. The best part about is that they will be relatable to just about everyone including teachers, professors, doctors, engineers, IT guys, nurses, accountants, business executives or even the friendly oldie working at the neighborhood supermarket.

Read them and think of how you can infuse humor in your greetings. Well, it is if you count trekking out of bed, climbing atop sofas and diving into takeaways.

retirement wishes funny

Have fun. All the best at trying to handle an old body with a young mind and fond heart. Wish you a happy retirement.

Otherwise I would be stuck with an annoying colleague like you. Their names are Bed and Couch. You will be hanging out with them a lot.

So in short, it is boring. Get ready to tire yourself out with grandkids, gardening and many other chores. Congratulations for stepping into this league, old timer. Remembering them is the real challenge. Good luck at being a forgetful pensioner. You will be at the zenith of your career, well knowing that the next step is a downward plunge toward old age. Good luck. Happy retirement. Now when you slack at household chores, your wife will shout at you. You are about to realize that now.

Congratulations on retiring. After retirement, you will argue with your grandkids, children and wife at home. Life remains the same. Good luck dealing with that. Congratulations, better late than never. Now you will realize that you need these things to enjoy retirement. Such is the irony of life. Have fun old timer. Good luck buddy. Retirement is when you will finally curse yourself for using an important deadline at work as an excuse for not taking care of your body all these years.

Retirement Wishes.Need some retirement card ideas for your co-worker? We've found several retirement sayings that will fit their personality. Being a Boomer, my friends are beginning to retire or at least thinking about it. Honestly, sleeping in past am sounds heavenly. However, my alarm clock and I have several years before we can reach that point.

The word "retirement" strikes a chord with all human beings. Some people can't wait for that Social Security or pension check to land in their mailboxes as they can head straight to the lake or links. Others couldn't imagine not working and will retire when they die. I, for one, happen to fall in the first category. While I love my job, I look forward to living life on my own time and having the freedom to travel with my husband, Kevin. Jean Chatzky sums it up for me: "Whether it's fly-fishing, taking your camper to the Everglades, or just traveling, everyone has got a little retirement dream.

There is a whole new kind of life ahead, full of experiences just waiting to happen. Some call it "retirement. Retirement is not the end of the road. It is the beginning of the open highway.

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Retirement, a time to enjoy all the things you never had time to do when you worked. Often when you think you're at the end of something, you're at the beginning of something else. For many, retirement is a time for personal growth, which becomes the path to greater freedom.

Don't act your age in retirement. Act like the inner young person you have always been. Stay young at heart, kind in spirit, and enjoy retirement living. The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house. A lot of our friends complain about their retirement. We tell 'em to get a life. When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.

I'm not just retiring from the company; I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it. He who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement. There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.

I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work.Funny Retirement Wishes : Retirement is a period of life when people get much time to relax, enjoy and doing whatever they could. Most people spend their whole lives planning their expected retirement and when it comes they need appreciation from near and dear ones as the fun time start.

If you have anyone to greet with witty and silliest retirement wishes to add some extra happiness then let these funny retirement wishes and humorous retirement wishes messages to infuse some funny feelings right now. Enjoy reading these funny retirement wishes and messages to make your greetings funny and wish your desired one a happy retirement.

Happy retirement to you. I wish to advice you not to try and cram too many activities into a short span of time. You have no deadlines to beat, no bosses to impress and no customers to satisfy so take your time and just relax. Now you get a new boss who knows about your true work ethic, organizational skills, and excuses.

Spouses make the toughest bosses. Good luck! Good luck dealing with that. Congratulations for your retirement. What I wish for you as you retire is good health. May you be heart attack free as you grow fat just lazing around.

Have a good retirement. Health, family, friends and relationships are some of the things that you sacrificed in your life so that you could work harder and earn more money. Now you will realize that you need these things to enjoy retirement.

Such is the irony of life. Happy retirement.

retirement wishes funny

You should have retired when you were still young because then you had the strength to do much more. Now all you will be doing is sleeping, eating and walking the dog if you have one.

No more strength for any meaningful work. May you enjoy your real retirement years just the way you enjoyed your retirement from the day you began working here. You have mastered the art of retirement and I can assure you that it looks good on you.

Read : Retirement Wishes For Colleagues. Have a happy retirement and try not to take life too seriously. After all for all the years that you were working you took things easy. Why should you change now? All your life you sacrificed your health so you could earn more money to retire happily.

You are long past your due date and it is time for you to join the junk yard of retirees. Have a happy retirement. After retirement the body grows older, the heart grows fonder and the mind becomes younger. All the best at trying to handle an old body with a young mind and fond heart.

Can you believe that finally from now on all days on your calendar are marked as Sunday? Enjoy them and may you always have a smile on your face. Retirement is the only thing that will make you realize how you wasted all these years trying to be mature when you can get back to being a child at the end of it all.

Have fun. It is interesting to note that when people are giving you retirement gifts there is always a watch or a clock as if to tell you that your time is up.Do you have a colleague who is retiring soon? Here are funny and inspiring nurse retirement quotes you can greet your nurse friends with. Ordinary folks might be afraid of the prospect of retirement, but for harassed and overworked nurses, closing our eyes, sitting down, and putting up our feet feels like a huge, huge luxury.

So check out these funny and inspiring retirement quotes. A recent study of retired nurses has shown that nurses should ease into it gradually by following these important steps:. Today is your day. You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself. Any direction you choose. Retirement is waking up in the morning with nothing to do an dby bedtime having done only half of it. Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you ran out of money.

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Funny Retirement Quotes, Sayings and Wishes

Our top 50 retirement quotes, wishes and sayings are useful for retirement cards. Retirement is a time to reflect and enjoy your golden years. For example, some Americans start a second career during retirement. The inspirational quotes below can help improve life during retirement. Also, a little humor goes a long way. Retirement is different for everyone and the 50 quotes above cover many aspects of retirement.

Thinking about these quotes and planning ahead is key to living a happy retirement. Building a nest egg is a priority and investing is an important step. Dividend investing is a great way to set up a stream of passive income. Many wealthy people live off of dividend income and you can too.

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112 Best Retirement Messages and Wishes

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